


A Chemical Mixture

by Auntie_Satan



Series: We're Going To Be Okay (By Completely Ignoring Endgame) [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: (no Shuri hate tho), Alive Jarvis, BAMF Darcy Lewis, BAMF Tony Stark, Carol Danvers & Tony Stark Friendship, Clint Barton Is a Good Bro, Comic Book Science, Darcy Lewis & Tony Stark Friendship, Disabled Character, Extremis Tony Stark, Hurt Tony Stark, Italian Tony Stark, Jarvis (Iron Man movies) is a Good Bro, M/M, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Not Steve Friendly, Science Boyfriends, Stark Tower, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Still Has Arc Reactor, Tony Stark-centric, Tony is smarter than Shuri, ceo tony stark
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-26
Updated: 2019-08-06
Packaged: 2020-03-19 22:51:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18979969
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Auntie_Satan/pseuds/Auntie_Satan
Summary: "I mean, what are we? A team? No, no, no. We're a chemical mixture that makes chaos. We're a time bomb."Bruce said it best, Tony realizes as he lay in Siberia. There never was a team. At least, not one that he was a part of. There only ever was the time bomb. And time ran out.Or, Bruce's metaphorical 'time bomb' exploded, and now Tony Stark is left to clean up the ruins.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Official Prologue Now Up!!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unbeta'd. Written at 2200 Hours, prepare for me being tired AF from staying up late last night watching X-Men: Origins (Remy Le Beau is my legit spirit animal.) Please forgive any mistakes made.

> _"He's my friend."_
> 
> _"So was I."  
>    
>  _

The words echoed throughout his mind, a harsh truth. It was Barnes. It was always Barnes. From day one, he realized, it would always be Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes. Steve and Bucky, Bucky and Steve. 'Till the end of the line, and all that ~~crap~~.

He'd always known that if it came down to it, to him or Barnes, Tony wouldn't like the choice Steve made. He'd always known, but it had never been supposed to come to that. James Barnes was dead, had been for 70 years, and it would from then on be Tony and Steve. 

Until Barnes wasn't dead, and Steve- no,  _Rogers,_ was hiding the truth, and Barnes  _killed_ Tony's madré, his  _mamma._ And suddenly, it wasn't Tony and Steve anymore, it was  _Steve and Bucky,_ and Tony was left for dead in a Siberian bunker.

 _'How had it come to this?'_ Tony wondered, though he already knew the answer.  
  


> _"He's my friend,"_ Steve's voice echoed.
> 
> _"So was I,"_ Tony's own had responded.

 

* * *

  
F.R.I.D.A.Y was gone, Tony realized, his only support, his only friend in this freezing hell ripped from him with the suit helmet. Belatedly, Tony realized, that today was F.R.I.D.A.Y's birthday; May 7th. His baby girl was 4 years old today, and instead of gifting her with the upgrade he'd created for her, he was dying in Siberia whilst she likely panicked and was probably frightened, worried, and unable to help; of course the tracker just had to be _in the suit helmet_.

 _'Well,'_   Tony thought sadly, his next thoughts full of sarcasm,  _'Happy birthday, baby girl.'_

With no way to alert help, no logical answer to his dilemma, Tony Stark's logical mind did the only thing it could in such a situation; _freak the ~~fuck~~ out. _But after that? It got to work.

* * *

 

Between hours one and two, Tony's mind slowly accessed the known damage. Concussion, blood loss and frost bite were his first thoughts, followed by slowing heart rate, and the ever creeping shrapnel slowly making it's way towards his heart now that it was no longer magnetized by the arc reactor. Decreased blood flow and lack of movement would slow it down a little. 

 _'At this rate,'_   he thought,  _'I've got maybe eight hours before it reaches my heart.'_

Onto another issue, his artificial sternum had to be absolutely demolished; it certainly couldn't hold against a super soldier smashing vibranium into it, that was for sure. Frostbite was sure to set in within the first few hours, three at maximum, and then he was at risk of loosing limbs. Yeah, not exactly what he had wanted... 

 _'Great,'_   he thought bitterly,  _'So if nobody finds me within the next few hours, while I'm completely untraceable in the middle of ~~fucking~~ nowhere, I die. Lovely.'_

Suddenly, Tony Stark wished he'd actually tried to kill the super soldiers.

* * *

 

> _"I can do this all day."_

_'But I can't...'_ Thinks Tony, thinking back to his wrecked physical condition and low chance of survival.

Between hours two and three, Tony begins to think of designs for leg braces for Rhodey. Wonderful, brilliant, loving,  _amazing_ Rhodey. Rhodey, who would never walk again because of Tony, and his stupid decisions. 

 _'Not that he'll ever see these braces,'_ scoffs Tony in his mind, inching closer to a breaking point. He passes out somewhere along the line.

* * *

 

(Tony remains unconscious through hours four, five and most of six.)

* * *

Somewhere in the sixth hour comes the memories. The sun has long since set.

_A dark cave, electricity, a bomb. Water._

His body quivers as the panic ensues. 

In the distance, Tony can here Howard begging for his wife's life on the constantly repetitive loop of the video of the night.

> _"Mission Report; December 16th, 1991."_

His mind is haunted, by Yinsen, by the 10 rings, by Steve and Barnes. By Howard's voice.

* * *

During hour 7, Tony is delirious from pain and quivering so much that he begin's to hallucinate he's home. No, not New York.  _Malibu_. With Pepper and Happy and Rhodey and J.A.R.V.I.S. 

In a moment of forgetfulness, he called out into the dark Siberian night, his voice as rough as sandpaper.

 _"J.A.R.V.I.S., are you up?"_ The silence that followed still broke his heart, even after all this time.

Heart as broken as his body, Tony begins to cry.

As his body shakes, his previously fractured ribs completely break. He's pierced in both lungs almost immediately.

And he's  _drowning._ And it's cold and he hurts so much. 

_Bomb. Shrapnel. Cave. Ten Rings. Yinsen. Water. Drowning. Obadiah. Iron Man._

He's drowning in Afghanistan again. Nobody can help him. Nobody will help him. His thoughts drifted as he slowly suffered, as though drowning on his own blood.

* * *

 

> _"You don't deserve it! My father made that shield!"_

Tony wishes he had let Steve take the shield. Not because he wanted the man to have it. No, he just wished he wasn't staring at it, remembering the man he thought he knew, his friend, whom wielded that very shield with such a righteous honour, compared to the man who had driven the same shield into his chest with a hatred unbound by prior love.

Tony realized something. Steve didn't care for him. Steve had  _never_ cared for him. Because how could you care for someone yet still hate them so much..? The answer was simple;  _you_   _couldn't._

So yes, he wanted the shield gone.

* * *

In the eighth hour, Tony knew he had ran out of time. The only thing that could save him now was a miracle, and to Tony's logical mind, a miracle was impossible.

As he fell into unconscious for the--- he'd lost count of how many times after twenty-nine, his blurred vision could barely picked up the faintest of lights glowing stronger by the minute in the eyes of the Iron Man helmet that stared at him. And although quiet, barely audible and damn-near impossible, he could hear a faint whisper of a rather familiar voice, answering his question from before.

> _"For you sir, always."_

 

 


	2. Chapter I

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, hello again all! So sorry it’s been so long; I just got back from a month long summer camp in Quebec City. I’ve finally gotten around to updating this story, and I’d just like to say thank you to everybody who’s given kudos, and even more so, to the few people who commented on the last chapter. You all have no idea how much it means to me to hear from you! I hope you enjoy this chapter, and the story. 
> 
> As always, Unbeta’d, and written at about 2300 hours last night up until around 0130 hours.

When Tony wakes again, he’s being shaken and jostled. His eyes shoot open, and he automatically decides to shut them upon seeing Steve motherfucking Roger’s shield sitting across the isle from his bench. 

Bench, he realized. Bench. Shaken. Quinjet. 

He groans loudly, drawing a response from the jet’s other passenger. 

“You’re awake?” A familiar voice echos around him, soft and calm, almost a whisper.

Tony only moans in pain as a response, but he’s glad he’s not alone.

He can almost see her sitting there. Bright red hair and black skintight suit. Natasha. 

“H... ho...” He chokes and wheezes, trying to ask.

”Shhh,” Natasha soothes. “Don’t talk. I’ll answer all your questions after. Save your energy, your going to need it.”

He drifts off again.

* * *

 Tony doesn’t wake again for several hours.

When he does, it’s to the white ceiling of a hospital room. 

It’s deathly quiet, and the walls feel as though they are closing in, pressing and squeezing. 

He gasps, and his chest flares with pain. The pain burns, and he almost doesn’t notice the tube down his throat. Almost.

“Shhhh,” Natasha’s hush, soothing voice filters through again. Soothing, that’s something he didn’t think he’d ever associate with Natasha Romanov. 

He shifts, goes to move his arm and Natasha suddenly sounds more sullen when she speaks.

“Tony...” she sounds resigned, and guilty, and he wonders why.

He wonders why right up until he moves his arm. Or what’s left of it, at least.

His entire right arm from just above the elbow down is missing. All that remains is a rounded stump. 

In his shock, he starts to choke on the tube in his throat and tears well in his eyes from the pain.

”Tony! Tony, you need to calm down!” Natasha is yelling at him now, but he doesn’t really notice.

Because he’s missing his ~~fucking~~ arm.

There’s a bustle of noise and the tube is being hauled from his throat. He coughs and splutters and chokes on the air. 

Natasha rubs his shoulder gently and whispers words into his ear, everything and nothing.

When he calms to the point of coherency, he’s still shaking and shivering and Natasha reaches across the bed to place her hand on his left wrist, a subtle way of telling him he still had that one.

”Tony...” she whispers. “We did everything we could, and more. There was nothing that could have been done. By anyone.” 

It was a hard truth, but he needed to hear it.

”Wh— what happened?” His voice cracked and squeaked with the effort to speak. Natasha understood though, because she held a styrofoam cup full of water to his lips while she spoke. 

“An hour after you disappeared off the grid, Friday contacted me in hysterics— well, as in hysterics as an AI can get. Anyways, she sent me a link to a program, something called C.A.S.P.E.R. I booted it up only to find myself locked out. She was very helpful in bypassing the lock and booting up what I’ve assumed is an emergency protocol of some sort. The AI running the program was cryptic, but it helped me find your coordinates.”

Confusion crossed Tony’s face, than realization, and confusion again. 

“Don’t think on it now, Tony. You’ll have time for that. But I couldn’t have got there in time. I’m good at flying a jet, sure, but you needed the best.” A shadow stepped through the door, and Tony’s vision blurred momentarily before focusing.

”Hello, Tony,” Clint Barton spoke, ruffling his sandy hair nervously with his hand. 

* * *

“What’s he doing here?” Tony asked, some long minutes after the man stepped into the room.

”I needed the best pilot. That’s Clint. Also, you’ll be interested to know that Rogers gave him the wrong information. Gave everyone the wrong information.” Natasha stated, sighing deeply.

”This is all my fault. I let them get away, and now—“ she trailed off, eying his arm, or lack thereof, in guilt. 

Tony was silent for a time, before speaking.

 “I forgive you. I knew who you were when you joined my side. You don’t pick sides. You fight for yourself. I’m not happy, but I understand. I knew what might happen.” 

He was being surprisingly calm, despite the fact that a man who fought him only hours ago now stands in his hospital room.

”I made a mistake, Tony. I didn’t— Ste— Captain Rogers never said anything about the accords. He told us the world was in danger. That he needed us. That he needed _me_. I didn’t realize what would happen.” Clint justifies, head hung and voice full of shame. 

Tony doesn’t respond, but he doesn’t kick up a fuss either, so Clint tentatively perches on the arm of Natasha’s chair.

And Tony realizes, he’s missing his arm. And he freaks, as expected.

He’s shifting and shaking and Natasha is holding his shoulders down. _Pinning_ him.

”Damn it, Stark! Stop moving before you tear your stitches!” She shouts at him, holding him tightly. 

He stops fighting, but his eye’s show his panic.

”Tony,” she said, “You’ve been in a coma for a month.” 

He blinked at her. Than looked at his arm. She spoke again.

”When the doctors got to you, frostbite had already settled in. Your nose, ears and fingers were damaged, as was your right arm, and leg. We went through everything. Every doctor, every research paper. Nobody could fix everything.” She sighed in regret. “F.R.I.D.A.Y did a thorough search through your files, where she found Extremis. We were able to salvage your face, as well as the fingers and toes on your left side, however your right arm and leg both had to be amputated; there was too much damage.” Natasha held his hand.

”Rhodes is alive,” she finally said, as if knowing his next question. “He’s paralyzed from the waist down, but aside from that it’s just bumps and bruises. He’s been asking about you.”

Rhodey had been asking about him. Rhodey, who he’d let down. Rhodey, who’d never walk again because of Tony. _Rhodey_. 

Tony lay back. 

“You’ll probably be kept here for a few weeks. I’ll bring you a Stark pad so you don’t get bored. Ms. Potts will be in to see you in a little; she’s been trying to keep the press off of this for as long as possible.” Clint stated, finally risking speaking again. “But Tony, we’re not going anywhere. You can count on us, from now on.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew, that chapter was a lot of dialogue. Don’t worry if it’s missing information; all of that will be filled in throughout the following few chapters. For now, Natasha! And Clint! And C.A.S.P.E.R! 
> 
> What do you all think so far? What is C.A.S.P.E.R, do you think? What’s happening with Steve and the others? I’m sure you’ll find out soon. This story will mostly focus on Tony, and what’s happening around him, however a few chapters will support a change in scenery. I’ll post again soon!

**Author's Note:**

> Basically a 'Tony Stark appreciation' fic where in Tony Stark takes the world by storm. And everybody else just sits back and watches.


End file.
